Talking To Your Child

Keeping your child physically safe is a full-time job in itself. 

You must watch out for predators, cars, bikes, bullies, and so many other dangers that leave your mind in a constant worry, but keeping your child from all of these things is just the beginning. 

As a parent, one of the most important duties that you have is to keep your child mentally and emotionally sound and safe. When you keep your children emotionally safe and sound they’ll be able to lead a productive life and you’ll enjoy a close relationship with them for a long time to come.

Children should feel easy being themselves and comfortable talking to you about various things that are happening in their lives, even if it is things that they know you won’t agree with or may perceive differently than they do in their world.

  Start the Conversation

 Don’t be afraid to ask your child how their day was. In fact, why not make it the first words you say after ‘hello’ after their day at school or your long day at work? It is nice to be able to sit down and talk to your child. It keeps you informed in their life and what is going on and allows you to build a lasting, trusting bond with your child. It is very important that every child have this.

 Sometimes it takes you getting the conversation going to spark the interest of your child, particularly during the pre-teen and teenage years. Sometimes children at this age have so much peer pressure and other emotions going on inside, they’re not really aware of the love their parents.  They make take out emotions on the family that has nothing to do with the current scenario.

 That is exactly why you should take the first step so that you’re not shutting out this resource for them. When your children feel comfortable enough to open up and talk to you, it can make a world of difference in their overall well-being.

You should always try to understand your child’s point of view, no matter what your original thoughts are concerning that particular subject. Be willing to listen and try to relate to what they are saying.

Things that your child feel or express to you are probably not the same sort of things that you were dealing with as a youngster. Times have greatly changed in just a few short years. Be open and willing to at least hear your child out. Valuing your child’s thoughts and opinions enables them to blossom into a caring, consideration adult.

Your children need you for guidance, but as they age, inserting their own opinions is very important. When there are important decisions involving the child, allow them to be a part of the process. When you allow them to give their input, even if your decision is one they’d rather you not make, it allows the child to grow both developmentally and emotionally.

Is Something Wrong? 

Don’t expect your child to open up and tell you when something is bothering them because so often this doesn’t happen and you will be waiting around forever for them to talk. It is up to you to recognize the changes that may occur in your child when something isn’t right with them.

While the signs vary in every child, it is usually pretty simple for a parent to determine that something is wrong.

  Some of the signs that your child is emotionally bothered by something include:

• Sudden change in their behavior
• Your child may show disinterest in activities that he/she once enjoyed
• Your child may change the group of friends that he/she has
• Your child doesn’t want to go to school or becomes nervous or anxious

Anger and irritability are also signs that there is some sort of problem in your child’s life. Oftentimes children are unable to direct their emotions to the person actually causing the issue.

 Family members are close and trusted; kids may resort these feelings unto those they trust the most. If your child seems withdrawn, isn’t eating dinner, or seems sad, remember, kids have so much going on in their lives and they often are unsure of how they should deal with the emotions.

Being there to recognize the signs that something is wrong allows you an opportunity to intervene and help the child work out any issues that they are facing. Leaving your child to their own vices long term may not be a good idea, as they may lack the maturity to make the best decisions for themselves.

Ensure that your child has an active life that keeps them busy and growing socially, emotionally, and physically. Perhaps, enrolling them in sports, music, dance, or special interest group may be an option or planning activity-packed weekends full of quality time with the family. This doesn't need to cost money but the bond of family is extremely important when you still have children living at home, as it helps to instill positive relationship patterns that they will need as adults.

It is a good idea that your child visits their doctor or counselor at least once per year to maintain overall well-being.  Ensuring regular doctor visits may help prevent emotional problems from becoming out of hand and allow them to get the coping methods necessary for their future stressors. Should there be a more serious problem with your child, the doctor can help you address the problem and find a solution, rather than having issues be left ignored.

Encouraging your child to be self-sufficient is important and as they get older, it is important to allow more responsibility so they learn how to become independent . Raising a confident child starts at a young age, and you are their first teacher.

Parenting is a lifelong learning process and it is never to late to work with your children's needs, so they can blossom into self sustainable adults, that are kind, caring, and compassionate.

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